Want newer node.js

[coyhile]

This addresses #17 as well as multiple security vulnerabilities in dependencies such as #19, #22, #24, and #24

I'm currently running these changes in production (if you can call it that) with my postgres shards for personal use on base-64-lts@19.4.0 using nodejs-13.11.0 from pkgsrc. In order to test this, I symlinked the postgres and initdb binaries into the postgres path that manatee expects.

The sample sitter.json leads me to believe that one should be able to use the system postgres installation directly. I'll put together a second PR to formalize that in the coming days, as tools/mkdevsitters postgresql builds all failed somewhere in the guts of the postgres build over ln semantics.

[coyhile]

I moved this to a draft; it's going to take more work to get this done. I got the primary working, but the backupServer, etc need more work to use newer restify and newer pg.