ruined

Just like with Smarties and M&M's, different coloured Froot Loops cereal O's only have one flavour.
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Curious George was a chimpanzee and definitely NOT a monkey. Notice he didn't have a tail?
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Nobody ever got warts from touching a toad. But those bulgy bits behind their eyes, as well as their tadpoles, are toxic. Some of them might get you higher than a kite. Either way... wash your hands if you ever touch one!
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If you keep making that face, it'll stick that way forever. Or it could make you rich and famous. Just ask Jim Carey, Mr. Bean, Jerry Lewis, Rodney Dangerfield...
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Reading in the dark doesn't harm your eyes. It might give you a headache, though -- from your parents harping at you to go to sleep. You are better off reading in the dark than engaging in just about any way with social networking any day.
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We were told that eating too much candy will give you a stomache ache because of all the sugar. But we also were given an endless stream of soda, which is damn near 75% sugar.
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Turkey doesn't make you sleepy. Overeating does.
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"You only have 5 senses? Well, I have the sense of balance. And of temperature. And proprioception. And pain. And hunger. When to go to the bathroom. Time..." -- Karsten Johansson
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"You have 5 senses? Maybe we only have 3: Mechanical (eg: touch, hearing and proprioception), Chemical (eg: taste, smell and internal senses) and Light (eg: sight)." -- Karsten Johansson
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"You're not swallowing 8 spiders a year. Ever noticed how spiders try to stay the heck away from you? Your breathing really freaks them out! They're not coming near you when you sleep." -- Karsten Johansson
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"Most of those toys your mother made you throw away? They're worth a fortune now." -- Karsten Johansson
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"Mood rings are nothing more than colourful thermometers. Learning the science behind how they work would have been more interesting than "learning" you are instantly whimsical whenever the gemstone turned pink." -- Karsten Johansson
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The orignal puppeteer and voice actor for the famously ticklish Elmo lost his job over sexual assault accusations.
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Before Walt Disney came about, the Brothers Grimm were already telling those same stories, but with a much darker, sometimes X-rated flair. Yes, Sleeping Beauty was raped.
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In the book version of The Little Mermaid, she loses her siren voice and feels nothing but pain when trying to walk with legs. The prince shuns the gimpy fish chick and marries someone less salty. As a result, the unattractive mermaid pretty much flounders about in foamy water and almost drowns. All she needs to now is kill the prince and use his blood to get her tailfin back. Instead, she kills herself to become immortal. Huh?

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In the book, Pinocchio kills "Jimmeny Cricket" with a hammer. It's a major part of how he realizes he's a real boy and not just a hand-carved doll.
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In the book Pinnochio, Gepetto is arrested on chlid abuse allegations.
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The Grimm version of The Princess and the Frog is less extreme than the original, by having the frog smash itself into a wall instead of being decapitated.
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In the original Mulan, Hau commits suicide so she doesn't have to live life as a concubine.
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In the original Fox and the Hound, the hound is put to death by shotgun when its elderly owner gets placed in a seniors' home.
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Remember the move E.T.? One of the costumed actors was a 12 year old legless boy who had to walk around on his hands for the role.
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Coyotes can run more than twice as fast as a roadrunner.
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"Eve convinced Adam to eat something that probably wasn't an apple from the Tree of Life. They got evicted from the Garden of Eden to ensure they couldn't eat from the Tree of Everlasting Life, which God said would have made Adam 'a god like US.'" -- Karsten Johansson
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Remember Lilo from Lilo and Stitch? Remember the creepy girl Samara from The Ring? Same person.
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"La Cucaracha is about smoking pot. Even the last line of the song states it outright." -- Karsten Johansson
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The real Christopher Robin quite hated Winnie the Poo.
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The 10 year old girl who played Ducky in the movie Land Before Time never got to see the movie, because she was murdered before it was released.
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You don't really eat or inhale spiders every night while you sleep. But you do eat bugs every time you chow down on shiny candies (lac bugs) or ones with red food colouring (which comes from the parasitic cochineal beetle). Eat your treat!
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Coyotes can actually run at a little more than twice the speed of a roadrunner.
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The real-life Christopher Robin was often bullied over the popularity of Winnie the Pooh books.
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Regardless of colour, all fruitloops taste the same. Same with Smarties (or Rockets as Brits like to call 'em).
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The first little piggie went to the market to become someone's dinner. The second pig was too young to eat. The third was being fattened up. The fourth was also too young to be eaten. The fifth escaped and ran off in terror.
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You are twice as likely to be killed from a vending machine than a shark.
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Shirley Temple had to wear a dental plate while filming while her baby teeth fell out.
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You can only clean things by getting other things dirty.
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"Despite being made in the late 1900s, many of the themes of The Matrix are still relevant today" -- Anonymous' student essay
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Did you know the American people used to have sheep?

Then the Republicans came. Literally.

Now they have soooo many American sheeple.
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Don't be alarmed. In the same way we don't remember particularly adept cavemen, the future won't remember any of us. At all.
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"Because of recruiters, I had a weird midlife crisis discovering 'too senior' meant either 'too expensive' or 'too old' and you'll never know which one is the problem.
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"The owners in this country know the truth. It's called the American dream, 'cos you have to be asleep to believe it." -- George Carlin
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How old were you when you realized Garfield was voiced by Carlton the Doorman?
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There is nothing more permanent than a temporary workaround.
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Group projects in school weren't meant to teach you teamwork. They were meant to teach you how to deal with the incompetence of your coworkers in the workplace.
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"You should file a statement. It'll make things go easier." The cop means, "It'll make things go easier for me."
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"4 out of 5 dentists agree." There are 201,927 dentists in the US. 5 is a very small representation.
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"*Free range eggs.* Nope, the eggs never get to roam." --  Karsten Johansson
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"NO LIFEGUARD ON DUTY"

To kids, doesn't that translate to "Go ahead, run on the deck."
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Hard drives are today's cardboard box.
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If you're afraid to speak up about your freedom of speech, you've already lost it.
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"For me, there are only two kinds of women: goddesses and doormats." -- Pablo Picasso
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"Some day after I am dead, scientists will recreate my brain with a kind of three-dimensional printing press and use it to create new quotes by me, instead of phony ones like this." -- Albert Einstein
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Every dead body on Mt. Everest was once a highly motivated person, so… maybe calm down a little bit.
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When someone dies on Mount Everest, especially in the Death Zone, it is almost impossible to retrieve them. The weather conditions, terrain, and lack of oxygen makes it difficult to get to the bodies. And when they do, the body is usually frozen to the ground.
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"Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups." -- George Carlin
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"Without Indiana Jones, the Nazis would have found the Arc of the Covenant, opened it, and died." -- Sheldon Cooper
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When you grow up, people stop asking what your favourite dinosaur is. They don't care.
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Moderator: Your word is 'seaward'

Spelling bee contestant: C-U-N

Moderator: Please, no.... stop!
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"If, when a white supremacist commits a mass shooting or a constitutional right is taken away or an innocent black person is killed by a cop or a book is banned, you say, "This is not who we are," remember--this is exactly who the Republicans want us to be." -- Mary L. Trump
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"Death is a distant rumor to the young." -- Andrew A. Rooney
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Questions for this year [2022]:

Are we still taking time off for Covid infections? Is Russia rattling swords louder than they did in the 80's? Are we gonna get the *best* meteor shower on May 30th? Is Ontario stuck with Ford yet a-fucking-gain? Groin preferring monkey pox? GOP lies?
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"Basically, the stupider you are, the smarter you think you are, and vice versa." -- Richard Feynman
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Mother Earth does not need us, we need her.
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"Nothing is so disgusting to our sex as want of cleanliness and delicacy in yours." -- Thomas Jefferson, third US President
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Hear no Evil. Speak no evil. See no evil. Meanwhile, doing nothing is ev
il
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Schooling is the best known killer of curiosity in children.
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When imitation becomes an unshakeable habit, your progress is held back.
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The more you cram, the more you lose your ability to learn effectively.
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Expertise comes not from study, but from many long hours of exploration.
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Knowledge is power only when it is applied and made useful.
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Scooby Doo taught us that the real monsters were always human.
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"The people will believe what the media tells them they believe." -- George Orwell
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It's sad how Wile E. Coyote is remembered for his violence, and not for his brilliantly realistic paintings of tunnels.
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It took Americans 4 presidents, thousands of lives, trillions of dollars over 20 years to replace Taliban with more Taliban.
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"If life were easy, it wouldn’t be difficult." -- Kermit the Frog
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"There is no technology in history that has ever been exempt from weaponization, and it is unfeasible to think there ever will be. We can't not see an object's weapon potential, for life itself dictates the existence of adversaries." -- Karsten Johansson
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"Think about it. The United States of America: If you have to tell people that you are united, then you probably are not." -- W. Kamau Bell
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A guillotine is only painful to the living.
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In the book "The Little Mermaid," they don't specify the mermaid's name or race, and so it is open to interpretation. However, in the movies, the mermaid is named Ariel, and she used to be white, but no longer is. People aren't annoyed by having a Black mermaid. They're annoyed by a specific one named Ariel changing race. It would be akin to making Daffy Duck a Mallard.
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"No exec is interested in tech. They're interested in your Value Prop. Period." -- Karsten Johansson
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What's with all this slut shaming, when we could be slut *sharing*, mmkay?
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"Jesse was real. I'm a real mom." -- Mother of slayed 6 year old, in response to Alex Jones referring to her murdered child as a crisis actor in a staged event.
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"I think if Donald served any constructive purpose at all, it was that. That he held up a mirror, and he revealed the Republican Party to be what it is and has been for a very long time." -- Mary Trump
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"Show me just what Muhammad brought that was new and there you will find things only evil and inhuman." -- Pope Benedict XVI
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"Some days you get out of bed and feel invincible. Other ays you get out of bed & strain your neck when you yawn."
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"People are not going hungry because we cannot feed the poor. People are going hungry because we cannot satisfy the rich."
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"I have a fax. I have fax waiting." -- Steven Wright
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"One way or the other, sensitive data will get encrypted." -- Jeremiah Grossman
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